My niece Shelley is blogging this time (over at With Arms Open Wide about a wedding she attended recently and how her own marriage has shaped her. I remember in our prayers of the people, we prayed that our wedding be not just our wedding, but a chance for the married folks there to commit to each other anew.
I thought about the things we promised each other in our vows. We wrote them very last minute (shhhhh! ;-), but they still stand up today to the struggles couples face.
One of my favorite vows was to love each other, even as life changes us. I think that's a big cause of divorce today, couples feeling like they can't stay together through changes...and really, isn't that what life is all about? Sticking with each other even as the hardships of life wear on you,and yes, change you.
Do I still struggle with some of my vows? Sure. And that's part of why they were my vows. I tend to be *very ungracious* when I'm mad (I'm being gentle with myself here ;-). So one of my vows is to "always speak graciously". Each year when Kevin and I re-read our vows to each other, I always break out laughing at that part, thinking about how badly I failed at that one - again. But thankfully, God gives us a fresh start every day. Even more miraculously, so does my mortal husband. ;-)
As we enter into the big wedding season, I hope all married folks who attend these miracles find themselves refreshed in their own commitments.
I also remember one of our prayers of the people being about our prayer that we raise children someday, to know and love God. My friend Dawn spoke that prayer for us, because she was my first spiritual mentor, and taught me much of what I know today about God. This was 11 years ago, when children seemed so far away...and I was so melancholy about our childless status for so many years after that. I had no idea the challenges that would come with this joy.
Weddings, what a wonderful opportunity to reflect.