Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Christmas

So I'm trying to get in the Christmas Spirit. I've always been a bit of a scrooge...not quite sure why. I get more stressed out about the fact that I don't think of "cool" gifts for people and that there are more gifts to get, than I get excited about Christmas.

I'm listening to "Grown Up Christmas List" by Amy Grant right now.

Do you remember me
I sat upon your knee
I wrote to you with childhood fantasies

Well I'm all grown-up now
And still need help somehow
I'm not a child
But my heart still can dream

So here's my lifelong wish
My grown-up Christmas list
Not for myself
But for a world in need

[Chorus:]
No more lives torn apart
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
Everyone would have a friend
And right would always win
And love would never end
This is my grown-up Christmas list

As children we believed
The grandest sight to see
Was something lovely
Wrapped beneath our tree

Well heaven surely knows
That packages and bows
Can never heal a hurting human soul

[Chorus]

What is this illusion called
The innocence of youth
Maybe only in our blind belief
Can we ever find the truth

[Chorus]

So it would be easy to blame the absence of my aunt for my bad attitude. Or my mommy-stress. But I've struggled with the "Normal Rockwell" expectations for years. Christmas has been different the last few years. When I starting hearing Liz Myer Boulton preach about Jesus, and how he of all people can understand our struggles...I've celebrated Christmas with a different feel. Jesus' birthday really *means* something. When I think about the fact that I never feel like I "measure up"...I should remember I don't have to.

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